Dealing with introversion.
I wrote this shit when I was stuck in a funk and felt like I needed to put into words how I felt because my being introverted was being a real bitch to me. Fast forward a few months, I still agree with this post to an extent, but now I think its important not to let whatever labels control you, whatever they might be. So yeah, if I wanna spend time with people, basically I just RKO my introversion and curb stomp that bitch until um u know…. i really can’t stand being around people any longer. lol ok peace carry on
What’s an introvert? The google definition says that an introvert is a shy, reticent person, which, in my opinion, isn’t that accurate. To me, it means that I enjoy my alone time, but that doesn’t make me shy, it just means I have no problem being alone.
Being an introvert is sometimes hard and not something I can say I enjoy. I’ve had trouble maintaining some friendships and relationships because of this and it’s not with ill intentions, but I can’t help it when I feel like staying in, being alone, and tuning out the world. damn it I’m trying real hard not to sound emo lol
I don’t necessarily enjoy small talk. I usually find it irritating and pointless. I wonder why some people prefer to talk about things they aren’t even interested in, in order to fill up “awkward” silence because what’s so wrong about sitting in silence?
I always feel guilty when I turn down invites from friends because I’m afraid they’ll take it the wrong way and think they did something wrong, when in actuality, there’s nothing more to it than the fact that I want to be alone sometimes.
BUT, just because I like solitude and find comfort in it, doesn’t mean I don’t like to go out. There are times where I’m down to go out, but after a while, I get tired, mentally. When I’m surrounded by people, I have to put out more energy than if I were alone and most times I end up feeling drained.
I think that I have two sides, an introverted side and an extroverted side. My “introverted side” is always kicking my “extroverted side” for agreeing to plans that I know damn well I won’t want to follow through with when the time comes. This is not uncommon, most people tend to fall in between the extroversion-introversion continuum, just as it isn’t unlikely to have both introverted and extroverted traits. I think that’s called being ambiverted but idk if i consider myself that lol
There’s nothing wrong with being either and contrary to what they are viewed as, introverts and extroverts are not two extreme opposites. I think we all can be a bit of both, but most times lean toward one or the other.